Follow by Email

About Me

My photo
Software techie and professional seamstress.

Search This Blog

Friday, July 28, 2017

the long process of purging

When I was younger, I wrote in a journal daily. It was how I dealt with every curve life threw at me.
I stopped writing about 7 or 8 years ago,  for so many reasons, but mostly because I wasn't ready to do anything about what I discovered.
I started writing again about a year ago. I've done some off and on, sometimes by hand like the "old days", but more often electronically as thoughts popped in my head. I'd thought I'd share some in case my feelings and words might help someone else with whatever they are going through.

I can’t hold onto to her anymore

I held her for a moment in this big scheme of time
I never thought there’d be a moment when she wasn’t mine

she’s a free spirit
she’s shed all her fears
held up her head
wiped away all the tears

she’s spread her wings
looking to the sky
she’s taken flight

all that’s left for me
is to kiss her goodbye

*********

I never believed I could fall so hard again
But here I am, feeling all the hurt
It reminds that I’m still alive
So thank you for this broken heart

I walked away from sorrow
The loneliness was the hardest part
I know now I do it on my own
So thank you for this broken heart

Now I’ve found my voice again
So I can sing
And I can soar again
Since I remembered I have wings

I feared I’d lost the way to love
With no idea on where to start
You helped me see that I still can
So thank you for this broken heart



Thank you, thank you, thank you
From the bottom of my broken heart

*********

His complete lack of bravery kept him from ever owning his own heart.
He followed the whims and will of others to avoid rejection and denial.
In the end, he lost out on true, great love and life itself. He passed his days in safety, monotony and unfulfilled dreams.
He was given an unwanted freedom for a moment
and was shown so many possibilities
for love with few constraints, adventure and risk
but in the end,
when his tether was tugged ever so slightly
he return to the unhappiness that was familiar

and was never disappointed.

**********

the next time we meet
you'll wonder if I know you
as I look through you
but my lips will be betray my expression
with one word
coward

***********
J

No comments:

Post a Comment